Huh

So it turns out I'm actually more okay with that whole thing that I griped about before than I thought I was.

Oh, and Finds of the Last Few Weeks

My mind may have been too busy/constipated to make a new post in a while, but my ears haven't been too busy/constipated to listen to new music!

First is Fucked Up Friends by Tobacco. It came out a while ago, but it's wonderful, and it just came out in the UK so there. Awesome psychedelic solo project by the frontman of Black Moth Super Rainbow, where keyboard melodies replace guitars with trippy results. Side 8 is my favorite song, but they're all good. Also, Aeesop Rock raps on one of the tracks.

Next is Tiny Sun by Bad Daughter. I'm gonna quote the original post that I got this from, since they described it better than I could:

:I know a lot of people probably look at my whole thing with Mandarin-language music and the bands I'm constantly splurging about and go "oh yeah look it's another indie band cribbing the western indie formula. cool, how exciting." That's probably a valid assessment of certain bands, but Bad Daughter's second and final album is not just good among Taiwanese indie pop, it's hands down one of the best indie pop records I've ever heard. Every song on this album is pretty much perfectly constructed, the sentimentality is never laid on too thick, and despite some of the tracks being relatively long for pop songs, they never overstay their welcome. There hasn't been an indie pop record this good out of Taiwan since it was released in 2003 and unfortunately this was Bad Daughter's final record before disbanding in 2006. So listen to it because it is amazing ok.

Then is Meanderthal by Torche, an awesome melodic sludge band from Georgia. They're metal, but they're reeeeeeeaaally awesome and accessible and they're playing the 26th and I really want to see them but I have no one to go with :(

Lastly is Skywriter by DatA. Now, I know a lot of my reader like DatA, so here's what I assume is his newest album. Haven't listened to it, but I know you'd want it, so here it is :)

Am I making one continuous mistake?

Oddly, it turns out that when I don't have much time to think, I make the most poignant personal discoveries. The title is a bit misleading, as it's mostly just a reference to Pictures for Sad Children (read it if you haven't, it's phenomenal), but I have been musing about mistakes a lot and, well, turns out I make a lot of it.

Of course, to err is only human. But I make a lot of them. And not even material mistakes, like making a typo or knocking over a lamp. I've been trusting wrong people, making incorrect judgment calls, acting irrational and out of character, and accidentally choosing the greater of two evils. Does my unnatural penchant for erroneous behavior make me superhuman, then?

For now I'm going to leave that rhetorical and muse about a connected subject. One of my most worrisome mistakes is my social perspective towards leaving for college. My biggest problem, I realized yesterday, is that I put my current friends up on a pedestal. Many of my high school friends, I feel, are irreplaceable. With each of my friends, I've had a unique experience getting to know them, which gave them a sense of individual greatness, in my mind. With this mindset, I've had three best friends at once, and it's allowed me to enjoy the company of friends more than the average bear. However, it's also prepping me up for what could be a cataclysmic downfall as I go to college.

This mindset has made me virtually unable to deal with loss. Case in point: Cornell. I went there for three weeks, and made a few friends, but believe me, I missed them much much MUCH more than I should have for only having known them for three weeks. I can only imagine what's going to happen when I'm faced with the prospect of missing people I've known for twelve years.

So yeah, in retrospect, it's been a pretty big mistake to keep this mindset. Very recently, I've more of less lost two friends that I both considered unique and incredible, and a few others are quickly drifting away, as well. Something needs to change, but I don't know what. I could alter my philosophy, but what the hell is the point of having friends if you can't appreciate them?

Basically, I don't know what to do.

C'est la vie.