Another pitchfork obsession post

Gonna keep it brief this time. Sorta. I need my sleep. Hardly been getting any lately, anyway.

This time Pitchfork's down to the last 20 albums, like they were before with songs. My predictions/analysis:

My Predictions for Their List, in mostly no order:

1. Radiohead - Kid A. They love this album so much, you'd think they made it themselves. Which they probably wish they did. Why do they love it? Because it's the future! If they don't put it at number one, I will not only be surprised, but also pleased. It's a great album and all, but it's as overrated as, well, Radiohead.

2. Animal Collective - Merriweather Post Pavilion. See above, more or less. 'Cept they'll probably put this 'round two or three, and instead of imagining that the album captures the dark, nebulous spirit of the post-9/11 Bushocalypse (like Kid A), it embodies the fleeting optimism that guides the noble caucasian american soul through the economic Barackalypse (like they said in the "My Girls" blurb).

3. The Arcade Fire - Funeral. To Pitchfork's credit, they practically did create this album. It would make sense to put it up here, seeing as they gave it a future and all.

4. Outkast - Stankonia. 'Cause there's gotta one album by black people up here, y'know.

5. Kanye West - Late Registration. Scratch that. Two albums by black people.

6. Modest Mouse - The Moon and Antarctica. The defining album of the most defining band of the most poorly defined genre. Also the second album of real music that I ever listened to. Should be number one, but eh, whaddyagunnado?

7. Sigur Ros - Agaetis Byrjun. The album that created the meta-hipster term "post-rock." That nagging albatross ought to push it down a few rungs, but it's still a beautiful, beautiful album. Deserves the top 10 spot it's probably going to get.

8. Jay-Z - The Blueprint. When you see this many black people getting together on a list, you know something's up. Better call the police just to make sure.

9. The Avalanches - Since I Left You. Oh my god this is the best album. I love it! They love it! What could go wrong!

10. Interpol - Turn on the Bright Lights. Call me crazy, but I like Antics better. They don't. And this is going to be their list. So there.

11. Daft Punk - Discovery. Okay fuck what I said about the Moon and Antarctica this is number one okay thanks bye now.

12. Wilco - Yankee Hotel Foxtrot. 'Cause Pitchfork likes to pretend that this album matters.

13. Sound of Silver - LCD Soundsystem. Good album. Gonna be up there. Not much more to say about that.

14. Strawberry Jam - Animal Collective. Try to convince me that Pitchfork is going to get away with not putting two Animal Collective albums in the top 20. Just try. Ten dollars say that they're gonna throw in an EP up there too. Also, Danse Manatee.

15. Panda Bear - Person Pitch. ...or maybe they'll just put this solo project all up in the list instead.

16. The Knife - Silent Shout. 16 seems like a fitting place for this album, too.

17. Sufjan Stevens - Illinois. The guy and his album that redefined college rock for good, and also for better. Kudos, Sufjan!

18. The Books - The Lemon of Pink. It's okay. They like it. It'll probably be here at some low number. Like 18.

19. Boris - Pink. This is a stretch, but they oughta put another Boris album on the list. They liked this better than Akuma No Uta, anyway. Also, it'll put the predicted number of "Pink" albums up to 2, and that is never a bad thing either.

20. Brian Wilson - Smile. Might as well, amirite?


And now, my completely unrealistic hopes:

1. Daft Punk - Discovery
2. Modest Mouse - Moon + Antarctica
3. The Avalanches - Since I Left You
4. Louis Logic - Sin-A-Matic (it is the best rap album ever shut up already)
5. Interpol - Antics
6. Jay-Z - The Blueprint
7. Japandroids - Post-Nothing
8. Harvey Milk - Life... the Best Game in Town
9. Boris - Heavy Rocks
10. TV on the Radio - Young Liars EP
11. The Unicorns - Who Will Cut Our Hair When We're Gone?
12. The Arcade Fire - Funeral
13. Animal Collective - Strawberry Jam
14. Sound of Silver - LCD Soundsystem
15. Louis Logic -Misery Loves Comedy
16. Sigur Ros - Agaetis Byrjun
17. Thao - We Brave Bee Stings and All
18. Tobacco - Fucked Up Friends
19. Gorillaz - Demon Days (shut up)
20. Tim & Eric - Awesome Record, Great Songs! (shut up shut up shut up it is the catchiest album I have ever heard and ever will hear shut up go away)

Fuck all that was too long and took too long. Sorry I wasn't witty. I don't need to be witty. Fuck that sounded pretentious. I am sorry. I love you, internet reader. Please forgive me. You know how I am about stuff like this. Peace.

ps: i love you. also im gay.